PostSecret
Marriage is a funny thing these days. We have unprecedented freedom to choose our mate, but people don't seem to be happier in their marriages and we certainly have plenty of divorces. I can attest to it because I've "been there, done that," but I think one of the biggest reasons for marriages failing is that people rush into them too quickly. You fall in love, and thinking that "all you need is love," you get married. Then you learn all about your mate. That's backward, of course. Before you stand before one or one-hundred witnesses and take a vow of lifetime commitment, you need to learn all about the person you want to marry. You need to sit down with your potential spouse and ask tough questions about life goals, money, children, etc. If your ideas of what your lives should be like are too different and can't be worked out, there's no shame in deciding to not get married. Marriage and a vow of commitment should be taken seriously and not rushed into even if divorces are easy to come by.
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Marriage Secret
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2 comments:
"...I think one of the biggest reasons for marriages failing is that people rush into them too quickly" -Or they rush out of them two quickly. My wife and I have amuch happier, stronger marriage DUE to the fact that we have perservered through difficulties. Conflict, hardship, etc. can be a good thing, if people use it and reconcile well.
Oh, I agree. But those hard times will be a lot easier to handle if you have spent enough time before you get married talking about important issues such as what each person wants for the future, money, kids, etc. And not just superficial talk, but really getting to the heart of the matter. Obviously no matter how much a couple talks there will still be some conflict. That's human nature. But by building a strong foundation you can make those times easier to get through. Not to mention you are more likely to find out if the person you are thinking about marrying is really someone you want to spend your entire life with. If you figure that out before you get married, you don't have to worry about getting a divorce.
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