It's a Wonderful Life

I will be moving soon. I suppose I should say everyone in this house will be moving soon. When my brother, Shawn, went off to college last year, I moved in with my mother to help her out as needed. Shawn and Mom co-own the house. Unfortunately, Shawn does not want the house anymore. I've known for a long time now that he feels it is a burden on him and he wants to be free of it. He also wants the equity in it. He is racking up a lot of debt and he believes that this will be a solution to that. It will, but only in the short term. He does not realize that he needs to change his spending habits if he wants to stay debt free.

This decision has been a huge blow to Mom. It has always been a dream of hers to have her own home. She has known for awhile that Shawn was growing resentful of the house, but was hoping he could grow up, mature.

Shawn has been unable to do that and I don't think he can as long as he has this house. He is having a rough time right now. Self-confidence, decision making, and confronting tough, emotional situations have always been a problem for him. The self-confidence issue has not been helped by his not having a girlfriend that lasted for more than a couple of months. Until now, anyway. His new girlfriend, Heather, has been around nearly a year, now. I would love to be happy for him, except that it is painfully obvious to me (and just about everyone else that knows him) that she is not the girl for him. She is very cold and unfriendly. She makes no effort to say anything to anyone in our family. Sometimes she will be at our house for hours without talking to anyone but Shawn (in annoying whispers). He has even admitted that she wouldn't mind if we were not around, so she could have Shawn all to herself. Everything about her screams high school. Well, she is only 19.

Shawn doesn't care, though. He is desperate for female companionship and she is desperate for someone to take care of her. He plans to move to Missoula because she is going to school there. His life is now being put on hold because the only thing he can think about now is her.

Anyway, it boils down to all of us having to move out of the house. Mom could refuse to sell, but it would just cause a huge rift between her and Shawn. I could easily help Mom make the house payment (I all ready pay some rent), but I have no way of coming up with the equity to buy Shawn out. Mom is crushed, as I said, and has shed more than a few tears in the last week. She even said she wished she had never bought the house. I wish there was something I could do. Of course I will be renting a place with her, but I want to do more. All five of her children have put her through so much in the last fifteen years. She deserves better.