Sex Education With My Daughters

Kids say the darndest things, of course, but sometimes it seems my daughters do it better than most because of their crazy home environment. This weekend they mentioned that their Mom's brother, Doug, had been making fun of their other brother, Dale, for still being a virgin, "just because he's never had sex!"

Oh, I do so love these opportunities. I talked to my daughters then about sex and marriage (not our first). I told them that I thought it was a good idea to wait until you are married before you had sex, but that everyone has to make their own decision about it and it is not right to judge someone for making a different decision. They seemed to agree with this and it isn't anything we haven't discussed before. Then I get this from my sweet, youngest daughter, Shaena, "Dad, if you believe that, why did you and Mom have sex before you were married."

Shaena, the one who is usually quiet and doesn't say much during our "serious" talks, asks me this question. I was shocked for just a second, but then recovered and tried to answer. I told them that it was a very fair question and they shouldn't be afraid to ask me about anything. Sometimes people make mistakes, but the important thing is that they learn from their mistakes is the gist of what I told my daughters.

Of course that's not all. I asked them if their Mom had talked to them about any of this stuff. Erica says, "No, not really. But she did say that sometimes if you get a crush on someone, it can be Satan lying to you."

"What?" I asked.

"Well, Mom said that she had a crush on you and thought you were going to take care of her for the rest of her life," Erica answered.

I tried to explain that feelings are not sent by Satan, they are part of being human. Erica tried to say, "Not all the time, Dad, just some of the time," but I told her I didn't agree with that, either. There is nothing wrong with getting a crush or "liking" someone, I said. It is only a problem if you stop thinking and do something stupid because of your feelings. Bringing it back to their mother and I, I explained that there was nothing wrong with their mother and I having feelings for each other when we met. The problem was that we stopped thinking (well, I'm not sure she had ever started, but I digress) and did not make good choices.

Whew. Being a father certainly is not easy. I'm certainly not looking forward to their teen years.

I was also thinking about the fact that "Satan makes people have crushes on other people." I may have to talk to him about that and see if we can't work out some arrangement whereby I can give him a list of women that I wouldn't mind having a crush on me and he can make something happen. I'm sure the price wouldn't be too high. I'm not really using my soul anyway.