Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Moody Blues

I had a bout of depression hit me this afternoon. Nothing in particular caused it. I just started feeling that way. It was bad enough that I was hardly able to do any work. I still feel depressed and pissy. Coming home didn't make it any better. I don't want to be bothered by anybody right now or have to think about anything.

It's really a strange feeling. I don't know how people who deal with this on a more regular basis manage. I'd go crazy if I had to handle this more often. Though I deal with fatigue on a daily basis, the emotional roller-coaster ride is the most aggravating aspect of MS that I have to deal with. Thankfully I have no physical difficulties to manage at this point. When those do come, though, I don't think I will be as bothered by them as I am by these bouts of sadness and anger. I treasure my mind above all things that I am and it's frustrating to not always have control of it.

4 comments:

Mom said...

I don't know if this will help but think of it this way. When you start to feel down and depressed, just ask yourself who can take my place at being suave and debonair if I'm not feeling up to it??? NO ONE!!!! And every home needs someone like that to look up to. So you're doing your community and country a favor. I may have to ask Bush for a special commendation for you. I know it can't be helped all of the time, but we need you so just hang in there!

Mom said...

I don't know if this will help but think of it this way. When you start to feel down and depressed, just ask yourself who can take my place at being suave and debonair if I'm not feeling up to it??? NO ONE!!!! And every home needs someone like that to look up to. So you're doing your community and country a favor. I may have to ask Bush for a special commendation for you. I know it can't be helped all of the time, but we need you so just hang in there!

FoxyShawna said...

I to think that would be the hardest thing to deal with. I understand and I will try to not take anything personally when you are feeling down.

Captain Noble said...

Thanks for the support. It's horrible feeling like that, being fully cognizant of it, and feeling powerless to stop it. That's why I try to stay in my room or away from people when I do feel that way to minimize my chances of snapping at someone.