Grandma Dope

I am going to suggest this career to my mother. She could use a way to supplement her income and 10 Gs a week isn't bad at all.

Ideas and Sense

An article at The Atlantic takes the NYT to task for just tossing out theories without any, you know, facts behind them. It was interesting if not altogether unsurprising in this day and age. What I loved about the piece, though, was this cartoon.

I'd never seen this before, but I love it. I printed it out and hung it up at work. I may have to have a copy with me at all of the meetings I have to go to. Instead of voicing dissent for every bad idea, I can just hold this up every time one comes up.

Kim Kardashian is a Role Model

In the "You Can't Make This Shit Up" category, Sean Hannity calls Kim Kardashian a role model for young girls. Shhh....hear that? Yeah, that's just the crickets chirping. I guess for all of the girls out there that want to be famous for being famous, "accidentally" release a sex tape, or pose for Playboy; then, yeah, she's a great role model. Of course, Hannity also equates liberals with terrorists, has no problems with torture, and brings anti-Semites on his show to smear Obama.

And to think this guy has an audience. That the bar is so low for success should give every American hope.

No More CAPTCHAs!

Chris Wilson makes the case.

If only someone had listened to computer scientist Moni Naor in 1996, proving that you're human on the Internet would have been so much more interesting. Naor was among the first to propose that simple tests only humans can solve would prevent malicious bots from infiltrating the Web. In an unpublished manuscript, Naor proposed nine possible tests, including gender recognition in images, fill-in-the-blank sentences, and a "deciding nudity" quiz in which you're asked to identify which person isn't wearing any clothes.

Alas, rather than getting to play "find the naked person" every time we sign up for a webmail account, we're now stuck with those reviled squiggly letter tests known as CAPTCHAs. Let's give credit where credit's due: These tests have been incredibly effective in combating spam. But even CAPTCHA pioneer Luis von Ahn, who received a MacArthur genius grant on account of his squiggly-letter work, admitted to me that they won't be a solution forever. For all their success, these tests are a crude way to weed out the bots among us. And they have proliferated to so many sites that the task of proving your humanity on the Internet is beginning to feel like an imposition.

I hope it's soon. Those things are damn annoying.

Beware the Gay Storm!

The Colbert Report	Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
The Colbert Coalition's Anti-Gay Marriage Ad
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Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor Gay Marriage Commercial

Republicans and Science

They just don't seem to get along.

A Bullied Kid Commits Suicide

An eleven-year-old in Georgia has committed suicide because he couldn't handle any more bullying. I have written before about kids and bullying and this subject is one close to my heart. Parents and students need to do more to stop this. It can't just be written off as "kids will be kids." No! In this case the boy's mother complained to the school about it several times and nothing was done. This is unacceptable. Parents and schools need to work with children about the importance of not bullying and if (when, I should say) it does happen, the hammer needs to come down. Hard. Nothing good comes from bullying. It doesn't make the kid being bullied tougher. It's not the bully just letting out some harmless aggression. It is a vicious assault against someone whether physical violence takes place or not. The scars of bullying last for a lifetime.

And sometimes that life ends too early because of the bullying. That's not acceptable.

Weekly Music Video

The 80s were great on so many levels. This is a great tune to get you pumped up.

Quiet Riot - "Cum on Feel the Noize"

Weekly Secret

PostSecret

Isn't compassion wonderful?

Do Not Go Gently Into That Good Night

This is not cute or funny or endearing. It's just creepy. In order to "boost [her] confidence," a mom has spent nearly $18,000 on plastic surgery in order to...look just like her 20-something daughter. She even dresses like her.

I know that the inability to accept the aging process is as old as humanity itself. The expressions of that fear still amaze me from time to time, however. What is this woman going to think or do when she's older and no amount of plastic surgery can make her look younger? Why is it often harder to love and accept ourselves than it is others?

A Brief Moment of Joy Before the End

If this doesn't choke you up just a little, you may be a Vulcan.

Shep Smith on Torture

I've been wanting to post on the recent torture debate because I am passionate about the subject. Until then, though, enjoy this fine piece of television (from Fox no less).



This is America indeed.

Memorizing Pi

As a geek of many stripes, including math, I have always been fascinated with pi, the irrational number that is the ratio of a circle's diameter to its radius. Some years ago I decided to start memorizing pi. It contains an infinite number of digits so I could never commit its entirety to memory, but I was curious to see how far I could go. I only made it to about 50 before I got distracted and got away from it. I've always wanted to start again, however, and now I have the perfect excuse.

My oldest daughter is turning into quite the little math whiz. She recently took the NWEA test and scored in the 98th percentile in math for her grade. Hearing that brought a tear to my eye. Anyway, she told me today that she would like to start memorizing pi, too. Yeah, another tear there. Okay, seeing my daughters blossom into beautiful, young geeks is a wonderful thing. Sniff. I'm gettin' all choked up here. Okay, pull it together...

So, we are going to memorize five digits a day. In 200 days, that should give us 1000. Why would you do this? you ask. Because it's there. And, maybe it's just me, but I think it's going to be a blast.

John Boehner Demonstrates Why Republicans Are Unpopular

The rank ignorance here is just appalling. Who's saying carbon dioxide is a carcinogen? No one! Well, no one except desperate Republicans still unable to figure out they lost in 2006 and 2008. This is a party that continues to look backward and to cling to the past. Until they come to grips with reality and decide to take an honest look at themselves and where they want to go, they will continue to lose. And deservedly so. It would be better for everyone if we had at least two viable political parties, but the current iteration of the GOP just does not measure up. How long will it take them to regroup?

Dr. Google

In a shocking turn of events, people are harnessing the great power of teh intarwebs for medical diagnoses.

To say he is literally everybody's first-call doctor exaggerates the matter only a little. A 2008 Microsoft study found that one of every 50 total Web queries was health-­related, and one-quarter of the million people in the study had embarked on at least one health-related search over the course of the study.

This reminds me of a coworker at my current job. I walked into the office one day last year. He's staring at the computer and he asks me, "Shane, if I had an aneurysm, would I know it?"

I just busted out laughing, not realizing at first if he was serious. "What?"

"I'm trying to read about aneurysms on the internet to see if that's what I have. So, would I know if I did?"

Still laughing. "Well, yeah, in the sense that you'd be dead."

"Really?"

"Yeah, really. Why?"

"Well, I have this sharp pain in the back of my head and it's hurting pretty bad. I was trying to figure out what it could be."

"Well, Dr. Noble can safely tell you that it's not an aneurysm."

"Oh, okay."

This is a regular occurrence with him, although the oh-my-God-I-think-I-have-an-aneurysm story is the best.

Weekly Music Video

A coworker loaned me this album, Neon Bible, by a group I had not heard of and it has since become one of my favorites. In fact, if it was a physical copy, it would probably be worn out by now. Here's one song, but you really should check out the whole album.

Arcade Fire - "Intervention"

The Captain's Chair

Oh, yes, I want one.

Hovering Over Your Children

This is an impulse I struggle with as I'm sure any parent does. Lenore Skenazy, the woman who became (in)famous for letting her 9-year-old ride the New York City subway on his own, has a book out now about how to step back and give your children freedom without killing yourself with worry. I think most of us do tend to hover over our children too much and this can have a profound impact on them for their entire lives. With my daughters I really try to give them as much freedom as I can within certain boundaries. I am not always perfect about it, of course, but I do make an effort. I want them to learn how to handle things on their own, how to succeed and fail, and how to keep going when they do either. My hope is that this will make them stronger adults, more confident in their own abilities.

Weekly Secret

PostSecret

Get Off My Lawn!

I can't wait until I am a grouchy old man. I want to sit on my front porch, grizzled and world weary, shaking my fist at the whipper snappers that stray across my lawn or drive by too quickly. I could also write bitter screeds against denim like George Will.

Long ago, when James Dean and Marlon Brando wore it, denim was, Akst says, "a symbol of youthful defiance." Today, Silicon Valley billionaires are rebels without causes beyond poses, wearing jeans when introducing new products. Akst's summa contra denim is grand as far as it goes, but it only scratches the surface of this blight on Americans' surfaces. Denim is the infantile uniform of a nation in which entertainment frequently features childlike adults ("Seinfeld," "Two and a Half Men") and cartoons for adults ("King of the Hill"). Seventy-five percent of American "gamers" -- people who play video games -- are older than 18 and nevertheless are allowed to vote. In their undifferentiated dress, children and their childish parents become undifferentiated audiences for juvenilized movies (the six -- so far -- "Batman" adventures and "Indiana Jones and the Credit-Default Swaps," coming soon to a cineplex near you). Denim is the clerical vestment for the priesthood of all believers in democracy's catechism of leveling -- thou shalt not dress better than society's most slovenly. To do so would be to commit the sin of lookism -- of believing that appearance matters. That heresy leads to denying the universal appropriateness of everything, and then to the elitist assertion that there is good and bad taste.

You know, I read something like this, shake my head, read it again, and think, "Really?" All of the things in our country that he could make valid complaints about and he goes off on people who wear jeans (not to mention people who play video games or enjoy action/adventure movies). How does someone like this get a column? How does someone write this and then other people read it, nod sagely, and say, "By gum, that George fella's right! If only people didn't wear jeans, then we wouldn't have hunger, poverty, disease, or death! Let's have a Jeans Party and throw all of the denim we can find into the sea! Death to Denim!"

I can see the angry mobs now, torches and pitchforks in hand, chasing down the rogues who refuse to give up their favorite denim attire. "Give me denim or give me death!" they cry. The mob, George Will, at the head chants "Death!" in unison while Will charges forth and skewers the poor bastard. Then, with a sharp tug, he pulls his pitchfork out of the corpse. Neatly adjusting his bow tie, he smoothes out his smartly pressed pants, and begins scanning his surroundings, looking for his next denim-clad target.

This sort of rant has been going on since the dawn of time. I'm sure that back in the mythical Cave Days, some dumb bastard ranted about "Kids these days and their damn wheels!" or "The sun isn't good enough for you, eh? You have to make your own little fire? Well, when I was a strapping young lad..." Blah. Blah. Blah. For all of you in older generations who just can't stand what the next generations are doing, well, tough. You had your time. The only constant is change whether you like it or not.

And, really, if this is the only thing you can get worked up over, either the world has become a utopia or you just aren't thinking clearly.